Drunk Posts #1 – Mystery Men

2 screwdrivers* in:

I was a lonely child until I was 19 years old. For my brother I am not much of a sister, I am more like an aunt who shows up twice a year and buys him cool gifts that his parents wouldn’t buy him.**

So, sibling stuff is unknown territory to me. I don’t know about rivalry or the kind of hate that grows inside you when your younger sister steals your clothes and rips them because, although smaller than you, she’s about eight pounds heavier. But what I do know about is one thing. I am not sure if this only applies to girls or if guys have the same thing: The Mystery Men, also known as Best friends of older brothers. I went to school with girls who went out of their way to tell everybody, and I mean everybody, how gross and unpleasent and unwelcome the best friends of their older brothers were. There was lots of giggling at their comments, and lots of not very nice nicknames given…

(I remember a girl who was especially good to come up with mean nicknames for her brothers best friend. It went something like this: “Pale Face is coming over tonight. Again!” – “Who’s Pale Face?” – “You know, the moving corpse…my brothers bestie…” She starts walking forward, with her arms stretched out before her: “Braaaaiiins…!”)

…Only to end up dating them two years later. To be fair, the best friend of their older brother was the first almost-grown up boy they were allowed to have a crush on because they weren’t related to him. A lot of my school friends looked up to their older brothers. They stole their CDs because they had the cooler music. They wore their band shirts. Older brothers were cool, unless they wore sweater vests and were hardcore into speed chess. And their friends were even cooler. So, if you could pull a Mystery Man, you were the girl.

Or was that just my school?

*just to be clear: I drink cocktails out of water glasses!

**After writing down this sentence, I realized that it might look awkward to readers who didn’t know my family. Why did I write “his parents” and not “our parents”? Because to me my dad became more like an uncle in terms of “I see him about three times a year” (Don’t feel sad for me, please. I am over 30 years old, for crying out loud and when we meet, awesome stuff happens.) And his wife is not my mother.

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